Hey there. I have to write quickly, as this laptop I'm using belongs to an old one-armed man who fell asleep on a bench outside of Subway. I was just in the middle of stealing his identity when I realized I could use this opportunity to update my web log.
Whoa, cool...this guy's an organ donor. That could come in handy when I need to replace all my organs, like Fidel Castro did. (Believe me; it's true!)
Anyway, I walked into Circuit City today, and I was like "Shit, I can buy TV shows on DVD!" So I binged a bit and bought every season of Seinfeld 4 times. The cashier, who was like Indian or Russian or something, asked me if I knew what a shower was, and I had to threaten to kill his children to protect my honor. The little bitch didn't even notice I paid him in Brazilian réis and monopoly money.
Hmm...membership to Costco, eh? Now it's mine. Going through wallets is fun.
I met up with my pal Frenchie, who was baked on something I guess, cuz he kept looking through all the trashcans we passed trying to find Oscar the Grouch. I'm not sure why, but he muttered something about a long-lost fountain pen. We didn't get to hang for too long cuz Frenchie lives with his grandmother...she died like three weeks ago or something, but he had to make sure she was doing alright in the freezer, plus he had to watch Sesame Street to find clues about Oscar's location.
Annnnnnd now I'm here. Just thought I'd update you a little. More to come soon, stay tuned. Sweet! This guy has like 6 credit cards.
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